A year ago today, Heaven received one of the most beautiful little boys. I was 8 months pregnant with Shane and completely devastated for our friends Angie and Kevin.
Angie and I were nearly 4 weeks apart in our due dates. We had gone through almost every aspect of our first pregnancies together. We shared so much, from stories of cravings, morning sickness, sober bachelorette party nights, and the excitement of having our little boys, Shane and Aiden grow up together. To this day I can still picture the image I had the day Aiden was born. We would have drove down to Orange County to visit the new Bailey family and I would get to hold that beautiful little baby boy who was the perfect mix of his amazing parents. I would sit there holding him, as he rested on my very pregnant belly telling him about all of the adventures he and Shane would soon have. Angie would be telling me stories of labor and we would laugh, as we so often did, about the awkwardness of childbirth.
Unfortunately, this day is just a day that will live in my imagination for the rest of my life. Losing Aiden and watching my friends grieve the worst pain, was tough enough, and then 3 weeks later, having to live the exact nightmare of losing my baby, was something that was NEVER a part of our plan. Shane and Aiden should be here together, not in Heaven, NOT away from their parents who love them more than anything in this entire world.
I woke up this morning and I called Angie. I know the pain of today, as I am anticipating that same pain on the 9th of September. I called to see how she was and to tell her how much I loved them. I just wanted to cry as we talked about Aiden because HE SHOULD BE HERE!
I know in my heart that Shane and Aiden are in a place where they will never have to suffer; where they will never have to feel the pain that we are dealing with here on earth, but that doesn't mean I don't wish for both of them to be here today. I wish that I was dressing Shane in his best Monster outfit, getting him ready for Aiden's first birthday party at the park. I wish I was putting batteries in my camera preparing to catch each moment of Aiden diving into his first taste of sugary cake. I wish that I wasn't writing in this blog about how I wish this day was different.
As Angie and I talked this morning we laughed about at the image that we shared about what our boys were doing. I told her, knowing my son, I bet he has prepared the best monster cake for Aiden to share with all of his special angel friends. I have this image of the 2 of them with their party hats on, smiling down on us, wanting their parents to celebrate this day, because today is a celebration of a life, of a very special little boy, one who was just too special for this world. I am thankful for Aiden and I know he and Shane are running the town in that special place called Heaven!
I know that a year ago today, the out pouring of support for the Bailey's was huge, and I ask every one of you who read this today, to take a moment to remember the life of their little boy Aiden, because Aiden's life, though short, was a life and a life that should live on in our hearts forever! Aiden Kenneth Bailey ♥ August 13, 2o1o.]
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2 comments:
Thank you Dana!! You've been such a wonderful friend throughout this past year. Although, I wish they were here with us, I am so happy when i think of our boys playing and laughing as they wait for us to Come Home♥ xo
Dana, Reading this post is just unbelievable. I knew you and Angie were friends, but only recently did I realize that you knew each other BEFORE. I have read your blog and been so impressed by your efforts in memory of your son Shane. Thank you for writing this post in Aiden's honor. I, too, lost my daughter to a undiagnosed, severe congenital heart defect. She was born still at 31 weeks. My Angeline is at the birthday party in the clouds.
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